Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Jesus Ties!

"ok, guys. How can we corner the Christian market even more?"
"Well...what about Christian men that are scared they don't 'witness' enough at work? Oooh! Especially "quirky" ones"
"Jesus ties!"


YES from the maker of MARY PANTIES it's JESUS TIES. He might have hung on a Cross already...but that doesn't stop Him from hanging from your neck!

For the maritime Protestant, it's LORD TUNDERIN' JESUSIN' CHRIST tie, for Sundays to let the heathens in your church know how much you love the Lord.

The EASTER tie for all your Rosary praying needs. Bored at Mass? Yes you are. Pray a couple Sorrowful Mysteries and then one of the Glorious ones! By then you'll be so bored of the Rosary you'll be Ok with the rest of the Mass!

In a double feature: BAS or BCP this week hon? Tie. If your Anglican Church swaps prayer books around like a bi-binary skank, come prepared for both options! For your low-Curch BAS needs, we have PROTESTANT RISEN JESUS which finds the balance between hilarious irony and devotion. And by balance I mean neither. And a more traditional stained-glass tie for the BCP. I have nothing snarky to say about the BCP....

For your YOUTH PASTOR! Having trouble fitting in with your emergent youth group that likes bells and smells and latin but doesn't really believe in anything? Slap this Jesus-of-Nazareth movie lookin' deal on your neck and you're half way to a tattoo!

And finally, the SACRED HEART TIE for the Traditional Catholic in all of us. On the go? Can't keep the ladies from following your tie down to its natural conclusion? (And i think you get what I'm implyyyyying) Stick the Sacred Heart on it and you'll have the ladies doing their first Friday devotions to your chest! It's a win-win!

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