Why get the book...

Why read this book?

When you could just watch the movie?

Ashes to Ashes

And if you feel like doing some Lenten penance, feel free to read this "alternative liturgy" (my keyboard almost burst into flame typing that) that might make you puke on the uncooked rice you were kneeling on.

http://thegreatstory.org/stardust-lent.html  (I'm sorry already.)

I Beg Your Pardon?

Never before has so little been said so loudly.

Wait.

Is that...
no...could it be?

IS SHE THE LITURGICAL DANCER IN THIS ABOMINATION?

I can only hope there is a person out there with that much crazy in them....

This needs to be brought to your attention again

The most blasphemous blackest black mass that ever there was, enough that I'm surprised that God didn't actually send fire and brimstone from Heaven.  Now that I have a mini-secure following, y'all need to see the garbage among garbage of liturgical abuses.  And if you've already seen this, enjoy it again.  Keep a bucket near.

Seriously?

Our Lady of Gaga

I didn't find this, but it's too good NOT to put here.

Ok.  Now.  I loves me some Gaga.  But...hmm...I just don't know how to feel about this...I mean should I be grossed out because it's an insult to God or should I be grossed out because it's an insult to Gaga...WHAT AM I TO DO?

Read lyrics here

found by the crescat









ugh...just...ugh...at what point does this "relevant" and "young" "pastor" decide "you know what would be a good idea" (and surprisingly, she's not an anglican!  She's episcopalian.  That's the end of the surprises.)

A couple of pallet cleansers:

For the Jesusy offended


For the Gaga Offended
 

My life, she is complete

Remember a while back when I posted this?



which is legit the image I always see in my head when ever I hear about "Fresh Expressions"

Well, some (genius)person has finally made the video look the way I FEEL it looked. You'll know what I mean when you've watched it

Yurg, Blurg, and Vomit

As positively nauseating as this video is, and as vomitrocious as most of the stuff that comes.... OK, like 90% of the stuff that comes out of the Anglican Diocese of Niagara, I must thank them, because without stuff like this I'd be out of stuff to post!




Do you know the story of St. Genesis? (or Genisious, I can't remember how to spell it off the top of my head) He was an actor in a Roman play mocking a Christian worship service, and during this mock play, he has a vision of God and demands at that moment to be Baptised and become a Christian, and some Christians do this for him and he's killed. (At least that's the story I've heard, if I'm wrong feel free to correct me. In fact please do!)

Why do I tell this story?
Because I'm about 95% certain that the "liturgy" going on in that video is the mocking play those Romans where putting on....ugh it's going to take 40 TLM's to get THAT off my eyeballs.

The Following

The following video is a pretty decent representation of what I was subjected to at Mass last sunday

Beware!

Gather around, dearest readers, and GAZE INTO THE MAW OF HELL!

Saint Kitch's Liturgical Abuse Extravangaza--Day 6

Ok, I've debated with myself all week if I should put this up or not because you wouldn't BELIEVE the sh!t I've taken over this.
It's...THE U2CHARIST!
(I also would like to call this post "shooting myself in the foot" but I basically don't care.)
I won't single anyone out, but lets just say once anyone finds out I think the U2charist is blasphemous I have to sit through some tirade about people's spirituality or whatever. I get the whole secular-song-with-person-religious-meanings thing, I do that too...but the idea of making the experience of singing u2 in a church, flashing lights, a name mocking a true title, calling attention to the liturgy itself rather than who the liturgy is for...kind of....lets just...hmm...how can I put this?...

When the music, the experience, the idea, the fundraising becomes the object and focus of a liturgy, even accidently or on purpose like in the u2charist you risk being put into my cavilcade (am I using that word correctly? it sounds nice anyway cavilcade cavilcade cavilcade) of abuse of the liturgy.

I wonder if trendy muslims desperate for butts in the seats that have the Mecca-rayna.

OH, and P.S. there is a certain person who owes me a serious muffin basket after not doing the original commentary on a video of theirs I had planned.

Saint Kitch's Liturgical Abuse Extravaganza---Day 5

Whose ready for some sh!tty music?!
"But wait!" I hear you say "how can a song be liturgical abuse?" to that I say "you have clearly confused reading with talking now stop interupting me"

ANYWAY on with the faith-destroying soul-crushing ear-bleeding hymns!


...every time I hear that opening stanza I can feel the Virgin Mary facepalm. Then when that first "cooooooome LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEve in the laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayt" all the angels putting down their thuribles in frustration.


and I'm saying this as an Irishman. Fick off and go shet in your hat with this hymn. Jesus comes off a bit...I don't know...Krishna-ee in this song.


Another one of those opening stanzas that instantly makes me mentaly check out. It's enough to make my mantilla take flight!

Saint Kitch's Liturgical Abuse Extravaganza-Day 4

and by "abuse" this time i literally mean the devil pushed him.
also: although there's some abuse here (im looking at you pushing-demon.) they are also very good liturgists. KEEP SINGING. IT DOESNT MATTER WHATS GOING ON AROUND YOU. YOU. KEEP. SINGING.

Saint Kitch's Liturgical Abuse Extravaganza-Day 3

ugh. i guess these were lutherans and not catholics...but still

Saint Kitch's Liturgial Abuse Extravaganza-Day 2

now i like soccer as much as the next person who is kind of intersted in soccer a little bit, but I have a secret to tell all of you die-hard fans. Jesus is really not intersted in who wins the world cup. I know! Scandal! Shocker! Jesus might have more important things on His to-do list (like i don't know, save babies, try to get you to Heaven etc.) than who wins a game of kick-ball.
ALSO this priest got in a loooooooooooooooot of trouble from his bishop (AS HE SHOULD HAVE P.S.) for doing this...guess he just can't feel the breeze of the Holy Spirit a-blowin' through the Church these days. Boy the Holy Spirit sure gets up to some crazy sh!t now-a-days. No more of this healing the sick B.S. ... WE WANT CRAPPY MEANINGLESS LITURGY AND WE WANT IT NOW.

Saint Kitch's Liturgical Abuse Extravaganza-Day 1

You picked the wrong week to stop drinking!

Let's start with something light...an apitizer of the sh!t storm we're about to experience




just in time for 2 months before halloween, it's a Roman Catholic halloween mass!
ok...what's the problem? Just watch and find out.
Say what you want about protestants, at least when the devil is handing out communion at their churches they don't TELL you about it.

(p.s. i wrote "romance catholic" the first time. who can tell i've still got the VMA's on the brain. Really? A meat dress? I'm a for reals gaga fan but....really?)

Another Theme Week

I am feeling inspired at the moment.

Sept. 13-20 shall be...

.:. SAINT KITCH'S LITURGICAL ABUSE EXTRAVENGANZA .:.

get ready to have your felt needs met!

get ready to "attract youth and seekers"

get ready for some fresh expressions because it's time

for the liturgy to call attention to itself!

prepare to propbably be offended!

yes it's the one..the only...

.:. SAINT KITCH'S LITURGICAL ABUSE EXTRAVENGANZA .:.

Oh, The Place You Can Go!

Fr. McGagus
and his boy-toy McGee
Have a new Mass
and it's a f*cking doo-zee!

Dr. Suess at the Altar
With Thing one and Thing two
As far as Blasphemy goes
This one's not even cool!

With talk of our youth
but only seven in sight
A once holy church
Quivers in fright

And to talk of Zaccheus
On a ladder of hieght
Doesn't redeem at all
This great pile of shite!

Even the Things can tell
these aren't good choices!
And, yes! They said "Bread and Wine"
In afected voices!

For you see, oh dear chillens,
If this is what's to come,
Get me a telephone
to Benny-Ex-Vee-One!

Alright enough f*cking rhyming
And get this God-Awful pink text off me please!

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. THERE I SAID IT WITHOUT A STAR AND EVERYTHING. JESUS WOULD SAY FUCK ABOUT THIS.

I swear this is real, I thought for sure it was a mockumentary, but no.
Seriously, seriously, I can't even begin. The only thing I can actual articulate are the following:

1) "...and invinte you to tea! Actualy.........bread and wine."
This is the most pretentious thing i've ever heard in my whole life. I literally gagged when i heard it and had to consecrate myself to Our Lady like 85 times to calm myself down!

2) "One Bread Two Bread Me Bread You Bread"
*Gasp!* Did you hear that too! It's the thousands of martyrs who died for the Eucharist rolling in their reliquaries!

Believe it or not

these AREN'T anglicans!


They're prespyterians!
AKA it was predestined by Calvin, er, i mean God, for this window into Liturgical Hell to be opened up.


*AND* at about 2.5 minutes a bunch of ministers show up. 1/4 is not impressed, 1/4 is far TOO impressed, and the other 2/4 are probably dressed as monkies or something