I know this opinion is not popular

But depictions of guardian angels are are freaking terrifying.

We Have to go Deeper

I suggest clicking and looking at the full version of this picture.  Because, and I'm not joking, every time you think you found the kitschy, most horrible, hideous part of the statue...and even the background...you discover another thing just a bit worse, it's infinite.  Infinite. 

Get out of my life

Forgive me, but I feel the only caption appropriate for this image would be "And not a single f*ck was given that day."

LOOK AT IT.  LOOK. AT. IT.

Somewhere out there, the worst part of this story is, someone saw this and thought "that is so beautiful."

By the way, I just got a 4 foot statue of Our Lady of Grace for 50 bucks, regular price 150.  

Top O' The Mornin' To Ye!

A happy Saint Patrick's day to you!
Being of the Irish persuasion, I tend to you know go to Mass and pray and stuff today. And not get drunk. But, in honour of himself, it's time for a little Irish kitsch!

This would be pretty if it was 1886, and she didn't look like she had just had a roofie the size of her own head. NEVER LEAVE YOUR GREEN BEER UNATTENDED, LADIES.

It's a cheap statue Our Lady of Knock (who appears to just be "generic female saint #4" wearing a crown...catholic statuary can get kind of lazy some times.) My favourite apparition because it is simultaneously beautiful and boring.

Oh look, it's THE UGLIEST Chalice and Patten I've ever seen. Yurg. Yurg. Yurg.
As my theology professor once said in a rare moment of hilarity, "Ancient Celtic Christianity stands in cold water up to their neck for 5 hours a day in Penance. Today, "Celtic Christianity" likes to surf".
Amen.


Happy St. Patrick's day to you, and since about 0.2% of my audience is Irish...uhm...you know I was going somewhere with that but I've lost my train of thought. ANYWAY: Go get drunk!

For some extra St. Patrick's day kitsch, see last year's post which was better because I wasn't stricken with influenza while writing it as I am this year.

Kitschmas--Day 24

What is the worst thing you can imagine?



this is worse

Sweet Mater Delorosa...

Ok then WHAT is the alternative because I certainly don't want to spend my eternity surrounded by people in sequinced togas having picnics with a bunch of cracker-jack white bread hill billies. I've spent enough time on earth doing that.
And there is a looooooot of hippy free-love humpage going on in Heaven...

and wait....
wait....
hold the phone kids...
Did I just...
yes, children, at 3:16 in the video...that's the effing magic painter.

There are no words

Except for maybe "ugly"

Why am I always the one coming up with titles?

VS.



Maybe more people would like to pray the Rosary if we had some more pamphlets with pictures like the latter on it.
just a thought...

Happy St. Michael's Day!

I know its called Michalemas or something but that sounds a) pretentious and b) im not sure how to spell it.

St. Michael, the defender of dashboards

The protector of S&M fetishes and fans of the movie '300'

And patron of weaponry/phallic symbolism (you hear me lady gaga? don't think 'alejandro' just HAPPENS.)

Not Since Vatican II

Has anything managed to bring Catholics and Protestants together as hard as this show





Now, I am fully aware that it is the cheese-balliest, theoligcally incorrect-iest, corny-sixty-year-old-woman-in-a-hand-knitted-cat-sweateriest show. But I still love it. Yeah, now what? You wanna fight about this? I'll get Andrew in here so fast it'll make your after-life head spin.

Angel Week-Day 7

Evangelicals might thing all incons, statues and even stained glass windows are idolatry, but St. Thomas of Kinkade sanctified these satanic idols of the Whore of Babylon into beautiful knick knacks. Behold, chillens: EVANGELICAL ANGELS





I don't have any sassy captions or anything because I'm just so jaw-on-the-floor embarassed I live in the same world as Thomas Kinkade.


.......there's the next theme week, y'all!